photo credit: markhillary
A lot of people tell me face-to-face communication is the best way to create a bond. No doubt, I agree. Seeing the person’s face, hering the voice, reading body language accounts for judging the person will jive with your personality. First impressions last, and constant communication deepens relationships.
I would tend to disagree to conservative people, who think nothing precious could come out of friendship, which sprung up from the internet. When I was still running ad approvals for an ad agency, I encountered a senior member of an ad institution, which has the sole purpose of approving ads that will come out. They are like the filtering system of the industry. They will not approve of ads, which they deem nor appropriate for the public or they give suggestions to make the ad appropriate. This senior member, probably seeing I was a new face in their office, asked from what employer I came from. I answered I came from an IT industry. He nodded and said, “Good. So you finally decided to be with people.”
In truth, I found the comment hurtful.
Just what did he meant by that?
Just because people nowadays mostly interact online does not mean they cannot be with people. Could it be helped that most friends and families are separated by various reasons, may it be economic or personal reasons?
Just because in this fast-paced, city life most people are running from one place to another, speeding up to make most of the 24 hour day limit AND there are TOO many things to do… does that make chatting not an advantageous source to be with people we cherish even a few minutes a day?
Maybe all he is seeing is the negative bit of cyber reality, wherein people are most of the day glued in front of the monitor instead of enjoying nature outside. Maybe he equates internet evil accompanied by all its distractions and at times, illegal, pornographic, racial and other similar information you could access from it.
But no, I don’t see it that way.
I know people who aren’t into social networking. They see it as a major source of distraction and un-productivity. So be it, but in truth, it all depends to the user how he uses utilized social networks for his personal life and work. The major reason I use the net and social networking… is to find lost friends.
Just recently, I realized I had been relieving connections with old friends I have not communicated for years. Most of them were more of an acquaintance level, even if let’s say, we were schoolmates for many years. What brought me happiness to me are the ones I actually shared a special bond… and they were relieved again in such a way that passing of years made me see friendship with older, fresh and mature eyes and the feeling of relieving those memories is so strong… it just makes me happy. ^^
These special friends I found in plurk, facebook and just a few hours ago, from YM. How we lost communication, I really cannot fathom. Some became too busy. Some fell out of friendship. Some, if I may be frank, became too pre-occupied to remember.
Still, with the technology, which others see as straction, the world suddenly started to feel more alive with connections. Randomly doing a friend search, saying ‘Good Morning’ before working, sharing current life tidbits with lost friends, it’s as if an old photo album gained more color and the excitement to add more memories in it is so breath-taking, it makes my heart feel so full to remember, I HAVE THESE FRIENDS. :)
I have to be thankful at least I am AND had been with this special friends I’m talking about. I remember this japanese drama titled, Densha Otoko, wherein an all-out nerd regularly went into this chatroom-slash-forum to seek advise to fellow forum members how to court a woman far beyond his social class. The series revolved around this nerd’s courtship and the forum members’ 100% support to his love endeavour. What is notably loving about this series is how these cyber friends thoroughly researched stuff to make the courtship more interesting. When the geek needed a new look, they sent suggestions with URLs of stores where he could purchase a good combination of clothes. When the nerd asked a good place to dine in, they would submit URLs of restaurants with different cuisines. When the nerd asked suggestions for a gift, they would show online stores of gift suggestions. When the nerd became very down and frustrated of his awkward efforts, they never failed to lift his spirits to the point they waited for HOURS in front of their computers, awaiting the nerd’s return from his dates just to get the updates. Really, how many people would do that?
But the surprise is… they never saw each other’s faces or have personal contacts with each other.
Their connection is the forum, communicating within its appealing anonymity.
It is a very endearing series.
A few days ago, one of our old or ‘pioneer’ Winglica members posted a message on my Facebook wall. She said:
“I miss you! Could you believe I knew you guys since 11 and now I’m going off to College! Wow!”
I can’t believe we were friends online for THAT long. And we have never been together physically. I’m like an older sister to her. I know how she felt towards her family, I know how she was hurt by friends, her tribulations over life and homework, etc. She told me a lot. I became her outlet of sorts. All these happened online. We may not chat as often as before but messages like this serve as a positive revelation on how long our friendship lasted over cyberspace.
So I give three cheers to social networking. I now am acquainted with lost friends and I am happy to be with them, even if only online for now. :)
